“HOW DARE YOU?”


The last few weeks have been quiet a challenge for my white, American, fleshy self. Manoj and I have been moving into a “new” apartment, which is actually quite old (over 100 years) and has been under months of construction and remodeling. We moved in 15 days later than expected. We moved in anticipating that most of the work had been completed only to find that the roof was still leaking; the water pipes were not working; there was no running water most days, much less warm water for showers; and 3 of the room were without electricity. When I would turn on a light switch, the bulb would burst and glass would go shattering across the room due to the high voltage and inconsistent electricity. Work men were in and out of the house throughout the day which kept me home monitoring the “work” while Manoj was at work. I found myself discontent and complaining most of the days. I was discouraged and frustrated that things were taking longer than expected, and that we couldn’t just “settle in”. I was annoyed when the “work” being done was less than stellar. The plastic, polly bag stuffed inside the roof hole was not enough to solve the leak, much less meet my expectations of work worth paying for. My discontent was rising, and my heart was less than praise worthy in the sight of the L0rd.

One day Manoj called me out on it. He reminded me gently, “It’s not a G0dly attitude!  We have so much to be thankful for. We have a home, we will have water that comes to our home. Most people have to walk to a local water pump, and sometimes far distances.”  Shortly after this, a coolie (a man who carries heavy items for people for work, and does manual labor for about $2 an hour) came to my house to drop off our refrigerator which had been in storage. Yes, a refrigerator, which he has just carried about 2 miles on his back!!! Fleshy filled, I looked down at his feet, filthy black and covered in mud. I started to grumble in my heart, “I just washed the floors”, and then the Spirit checked me. “HOW DARE YOU?”  This man has filthy feet because he lives in a home with dirt floors, and has no running water. HOW DARE YOU!


Discontentment leads to a joyless life focused on self, and misses the heart of G0d for oneself and for others. I am learning this lesson slowly slowly. Please pray for me to grasp the fullness of G0d’s love and His heart for others. Help me to represent it well in my home and outside of my home, and to die to self and find my contentment in Chri$t alone.

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